As we celebrated Kyle's birthday...

My precious nephew Kyle has anxiously anticipated the arrival of his fifth birthday since the mid-summer. What is it about kids? -They love the passage time! As adults, when another milestone appears on the horizon, we start say things like, "How can it be that I am yet another year older?" and -now a more vivid reality to me- "How can it be that Greta isn't here to be the life of our parties?"

So last week, the big day arrived and we celebrated in style! Our family has always made such a big deal out of birthdays. There's NOT a family birthday I can remember "not recognizing" in our Jones house! Last spring, we lost my sister - Kyle's Mommy in death. The arrival of the red-circled dates on our calendars have come with a flood of emotions. There's a void that quite simply can't be denied.

Last year, when we gathered to celebrate Kyle's birthday, Greta was not well and yet she perservered to bless Kyle with his birthday wishes! Even if I could savor the flavor of the frosting from the birthday cake nothing could come close to experiencing the sweetness of the moment. She was so very excited to have planned his cool CARZ party and organized his big boy bedroom with all kinds of transportation-themed stuff. The little guy just loves automobiles! (As one proud Auntie ~ I just have to interject here - he's very bright and can tell you the make and model of most any vehicle on the road! I'm equally amazed at his "sense of direction", which, for the record, he certainly acquired his mother's DNA!)

I wonder if my sister "had any thought" that Kyle's 4th birthday would be her last to share with him on this side of eternity? (Sadly, it was the last time Greta would see and hug Mom Mom Esther - our Grandmother for whom she was actively helping to plan a surprise 90th birthday party for - one she would not live to attend.) It was the last family event where we would gather under the roof of Greta's house. She felt God had made such great a provision ordaining the acquisition of her long-awaited disability settlement which brought her dream of home ownership to reality.

Despite biting, physical pain, emotional exhaustion and an oxygen tank that seemed to encumber her every move, she smiled through it, scrunching her nose up against his Kyle's precious face. She smothered him with kisses galore...NO ONE could cuddle like Gret! Her affectionate ways were so life size that the reality of her absence stings the eyes of those of us she loved and loved on! As she labored for each breath, she sat right beside her "little stud muffin" watching him widdle away at his steep pile of presents. I can vividly see my sister hugging Kyle Mitchell ever-so-tightly.

This year we tried to keep it light but it's hard not to drift back to times with her here. In our hearts she can't be replaced;it isn't like we can just go out and find another sister, daughter or mother to take her place. Grief is freaky but we are facing it head-on. She would want us to go on and keep making happy memories for her kids. We press on, loving them sweeter and deeper than before her passing.


The "Herbie the Love Bug cake" Kyle begged for was not an easy thing to figure out. But in honor of Gret's zest for life...and with the aid of checkered flag props and party supplies Aunt Candy had gathered...we pulled it off!

Kyle was elated that I came through with his request. You would've thought I told him he just won a trip to Disney World or free reign of a toy store! It brought a tears for me and yet a wide smile to my face when I became the recipient of "that trademark" - "cuddle bug" affectionate hug and kiss that felt so familiar now on my end of the love...a memory that is going to stick with me a longggggg time! A precious aspect of his Mommy that lives on!